Watch me disappear

REPEAT YEAR // Wednesday, October 31, 2012

1:10 AM

I, AM, JUST, SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FUCKING MAD AT S.A. I JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY HAVE TO MAKE LIVES SO DIFFICULT FOR US IT'S JUST TOO MUCH FOR ME TO TAKE. JUST STOP TEARING MY SELF-ESTEEM APART LIKE THIS WILL YOU. STOP FUCKING WASTING MY TIME, MAKING US DO USELESS THINGS AND STOP FUCKING EMBARRASSING US IN FRONT OF OTHERS. WHAT A BLOODY FUCKED UP PLACE WHERE THIS IS ABSOLUTELY, COMPLETELY NO ROOM AT ALL FOR MISTAKES, FOR RETAINEES WHO ARE MADE TO FEEL LIKE THEY'RE WORTHLESS CRIMINALS WHO DO NOT DESERVE A FUCKING SECOND CHANCE. IF I KNEW THINGS WOULD HAVE BEEN SO DIFFICULT THEN I WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER OFF SOMEWHERE ELSE THAT APPRECIATES MY EXISTENCE IN THIS FUCKING WORLD.

TO ADD ON, COUNCIL IS JUST SO FUCKING FUCKING FUCCCCKKKKKIIINNNNGGGGG SCREWED UP SHIT I AM NOT SORRY TO SAY THIS AT ALL GO ON AND SUE ME. FUCK YOU COUNCIL. ALWAYS THINKING THAT YOU'RE SO MUCH BETTER THAN THE REST OF THE FUCKING SCHOOL AND THAT YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO BOSS US AROUND AND WE HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOU. YOU KNOW WHAT, FUCK YOU, HELL NO YOU DON'T OWN MY COLLEGE LIFE SO GO AND EAT SHIT. GO ON AND FUCKING EAT SHIT AND STOP ACTING LIKE YOU ARE MORE SUPERIOR THAN OTHER CCAS AND THAT YOU CAN TELL US WHAT TO DO. YOU ARE JUST A CCA LIKE ANY OTHER GROUP OF STUDENTS IN SCHOOL, SO MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS, DO YOUR OWN SHIT AND STOP BOTHERING ME WITH ALL THE NONSENSE YOU COME UP WITH. MY LIFE DOES NOT REVOLVE AROUND SERVING THE SCHOOL LIKE YOU, SO SUCK THUMB AND FUCK RIGHT OFF.

FUCKING HELL I NEED TO BREATHE, AND LET OUT ALL THESE STEAM.

"Retaining is not that simple. It is not all that easy. It is not something that you can just shrug off, slack off cause you have done it before or that you already know."

No, in fact it's just fucking, fucking, fucking difficult to go through a repeat year and I wished someone could understand what the fuck I'm going through. Can't believe I actually survived (not lived) through one year of such pathetic shit hellish life of a fucking repeat college student.

WHAT A NICE 300TH POST TO DEDICATE TO MY BLOG.